Wedding Shticks

Where does the concept of having shtick at weddings come from? Most of the weddings I have gone to, no matter where they where, had shtick. The Kallah’s friends were in charge and made sure they were sameyach the kallah with the latest shtick. The choson’s friends had their own shtick and even costumes! They are great; everyone enjoys them and has fun with them. Usually.

But where does this custom come from? Why do we find it necessary to spend the extra money to enhance the wedding? Isn’t the mere fact that the people are there and dancing enough? Do we need outside influence now to make the weddings a greater wedding? The prices and the shtick itself can get outrageous!

You have teddy bears on sticks holding balloon filled confetti so the kallah can stand on a chair or not and pop the balloons. You have pompoms, batons, arches made of silk flowers, or helium balloons, or forget the arch, have balloons fall down the choson and kallah walk in. There are Disney characters that visit, or other such costumes that the crowd rents and dances with out showing their identity. There’s the usual umbrella, that copies the May Day affair and the bride holds this umbrella with colorful ribbon streaming down, and the girls dance around her. Oh, and let’s not forget the M A Z E L T O V signs the girls hold up and dance around with, along with some whips, and what have you.

Now, I do love the shtick! They are cute and the kallah likes them. But what is the real point of them? I mean it is nice to make the kallah happy, but there are other ways to make her happy. Show up. Dance. She is happy with that, isn’t she? Does the shtick make a wedding? Why does one feel that the kallah is a nebach, if the shtick isn’t up to par with the latest fad? The huge flowers that people dance with? Some of them are so useless there is not point in them other than to be different!

I have been to one wedding where there has been no shtick. The kallah was an older teacher in a BY school and she was also a Baalas Teshuva. She had her wedding in a smaller place than the norm, and the crowd was thinner. The girls whom she taught the previous year were invited for dancing and boy did they dance. Remember these girls were just a year out of high school. This was a wedding. It did not matter that the kallah was ten years their senior (at least) and it didn’t matter that no one thought to bring shtick. The dancing was amazing. The girls used what ever they had to use and made it a very leibadike wedding. Now mind you there were about twelve girls there dancing and the rest of the crowd was older then them. The girls took to the music and took charge when they felt the dancing was getting shvach. The napkins, plain old napkins sitting on the tables were used as whips, fans, and of course they made her jump rope with them. The girls took the napkins and used them as pom-poms while dancing. You see, it might not have been bright with different arrays of colors and different shtick to enhance the wedding, but the kallah was radiant, the girls were glowing and the guests were in for a big surprise. The girls made the Rebbetzins dance and made the “bubbies” who stand on the side line come and dance. The older kallah never looked so happy. It was a wedding!

That is what I call mesameyach the kallah. Not the colorful pom-poms or try to outdo the previous wedding with the most current and updated and never seen before shtick. The point of the shtick if for her, and she was happy with what she saw. She never expected such a dance and she got a surprise. A happy surprise. And the girls, whether they realize it or not did a tremendous mitzvah that will be rewarded one day. I don’t know if they know what a mitzvah they did, but it was surely appreciative.

So the next time you are asked to bring shtick to a wedding, think real hard and find out where else the money can go to and cut down a bit. Is it really necessary to have all the fan fare there? Is it really called for? Can’t we use what we have at the hall, or make some cute funny shtick for her and just dance with the kallah? Try it; you might start a new fad.

Mazel Tov.
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